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dear wife

Well I am not the best, but I am getting better. It is hard these days with my two closest friends on either side of the globe (Australia and Hawaii). But we do our best and no matter how long it has been when we meet up or talk it seems like no time at all, so I count that as a good thing. But yeah I am not so good and wish I was better. My mom recently reconnected with a friend she had not seen since elementary school and they are now close again. So I think a true friend can never really be lost.


I am abysmal at keeping in touch and I develop serious mental blocks to calling my friends, in most cases, on account of the initial delay. As the delay lengthens, I get more upset. (This reminds me to call Lance, but it's already been days since he left a message. I hope he isn't waiting by the phone for me to call.) When one of us eventually reaches out, usu. by phone, I forget about the period of absence. Have I answered the question?


I hear you man. I'm sitting here in Toyko with nothing to do- the sun has barely risen over the Eastern US, so I Googled my long-lost fraternity Big Brother Teddy, who lives in Tokyo. And guess what? We're heading out to dinner in a few hoping to make up for ten lost years. Just like yesterday. And give my little Cheeky niece a big squeeze for me.




I'm good at keeping in touch for a while but if I don't feel thaat the other person is making an effort, I stop or slow down. Having more friends would be one of my goals if I could strt all over again. I've never had lots of freinds and have never felt the need to always do things in a group. I wish i had some really close friends that had been with me my whole life but I don't. I don't go around moping aobut this but sometimes I miss it. I don't know wht the hell my parents were doing when I was little but apparently not training me to be social or hang out with other people. I'm trying to not have my son make similar mistakes and so far he's very social.



Thanks for reminding me what a shit I am. I will make a couple of calls today.


:writing on palm: "Call John soon!!!"

I'm not so good. Maybe this will inspire me to get better!

BTW, were I in uniform, I would have the crossed bayonets of the Tenth on my right shoulder. I was with them in Somalia. I hope Brian is, and remains, well.


Mahther, could you bring me a few more mini-marshmallllohs for my hot cocoa?

I love ya, man.

Social Hub

Every Sunday in the Palm the recurring todo "bl/fe" shows up. "Birthday List/Friend Engine".

It's a spreadsheet with the list of the people I want to stay hooked with and how often I want to "chat" and "hang". Depending on the last time we talked or kicked it, someone's name is either green, yellow or red.

You are currently yellow, about to be addressed this weekend in New Orleans. It's also the place where I keep track of about 50 people's birthdays -- it's a nice annual call. I also keep other big days in there -- I just removed your Amex anniversary (you told me what it was one of the first times we met, in the Amex class on building networks).

Friends are the spice.


I used to be better, before this whole family thing consumed my life. It's a bummer, because alot of them are going through the same things as I am right now, and I'd love to be able to share the experience with them, but I'm just...so...damn...TIRED by the time I remember that oh, I haven't talked to so and so in an eon.

It's also been a challenge due to some awkwardness in integrating the new people in my life with the people I've got a history with. It can be intimidating to meet people that your SO has tons of history with that you don't know anything about.


Awwww, sniff, sniff.... I haven't been on your blog for a few weeks...thanks for the mention and it makes me sad too that we live right here and can't seem to get together more than quarterly. BUT-- I'm ready for a drink-up tomorrow night. Do I really swear like a sailor? I think I'm very ladylike but you recently told me I'm a huge nerd and didn't know it so now I second guess a lot. :-)

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